Republican Fashion Update: Orange is the New Red

“Knock, knock.”
“Who’s there?”
“Um, Don’t you have something to do in the lower 48?”
“No, Senator. Open the door. We have a warrant. We’d like to take a look at your remodeling project. Seems a bit off, Sir.”
“So? I’m Senator for life!”
“Possibly, Sir, but we’re still coming in.”
“I’m a powerful man, I get what I want!”
“Well, Sir, I hope you want a jumpsuit.”
“Give the jumpsuits to those losers in Louisiana!”
“Sir, I’m aware you once threatened to resign from the Senate if your earmark for the Alaskan bridges was sent to help Louisiana post Katrina. Not your finest moment. And those bridges…”
“Nowhere IS somewhere, dammit!”

A swarm of federal agents serving a search warrant at his home is unprecedented in Alaska politics and is part of what appears to be a widening corruption investigation that first burst into view last August. That’s when agents raided the offices of state legislators and oil field services company Veco, among others.

Federal investigators and grand juries in Anchorage and Washington, D.C., have been seeking information about a remodeling project at Stevens’ Girdwood home that occurred in 2000. The project, which more than doubled the size of the house, was overseen by Veco CEO Bill Allen. Two months ago, Allen pleaded guilty to bribing state lawmakers and agreed to cooperate with authorities. Veco vice president Richard Smith pleaded guilty to identical charges. — Anchorage Daily News

Something is definitely rotten in the state of Alaska, and the Feds keeping finding more and more. Keeping Stevens company is Rep. Don Young, R-AK, under investigation for his ties to Veco, state Senate President Ben Stevens (Ted Stevens’ son) whose office was raided by the FBI last year and who was involved is a fishy fish deal in 2005, and junior Senator Lisa Murkowski, who last week, under intense scrutiny, revesed a sweetheart land purchase she made for herself.

Now that orange is the new red, I predict Alaska is going blue.

2 Responses to “Republican Fashion Update: Orange is the New Red”

  1. Ken Grandlund Says:

    This is all just part of a vast left wing conspiracy Jet-

    You know- the one that is trying to get corruption out of the Congress- at least the most egregoius corruption that is.

  2. Jet Netwal Says:

    Silly me, Ken. Now, where’d I put my tinfoil hat?

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